All week long, in the early hours before the bustle begins, our home transforms, one ornament, one decoration, one memory at a time into a Christmas wonderland. I deliberately choose not to hurry and check this task off my to-do list. The dawdling and the stretching out of every precious moment are as delightful as the big day.
My youngest daughter is as enamored by the magic as I. Kolby tears out of bed and runs downstairs to the tree simply to turn on the lights and bask in the glow against the darkness of the morn. She has left a small pile of her favorite ornaments out on the buffet, un-hung, waiting in limbo. I think it’s a stall tactic. I don’t think she wants to be done either. Her joy is palpable.
Even my husband chimes in, “Sam, there is something so fulfilling about setting up the tree.” It’s the hunt at Home Depot with Kolby by his side in a Santa hat, then dragging the tree home atop the car, perilously secured by fraying ropes, to placing it in the stand and covering it with sparkling lights. These tender moments strike a chord in our hearts.
The Hallmark movies would like to tell us the “Christmas Spirit” has arrived, and I couldn’t agree more, but I believe it’s far beyond the cookie baking, the White Elephant gifts, and the house with the most elaborate light and sound show.
This communal magic, the nostalgia so thick you can smell, this sense of forgiveness and grace offered magnanimously by all is not found by believing in Santa or buying more stuff as the world would have us believe.
Yes, Virginia there is a Santa Claus, but the Christmas spirit is so much more than that.Y
It’s more than the elusive “Fa la la la” feeling, more than the decorations and more than eight tiny reindeer.
I’ve had to be intentional this year to treasure the spirit. I catch it slipping away so quickly and have to deliberately reel it back in. My son will miss his first Christmas at home, ever, thanks to Nevada playing in a Bowl Game in Arizona on the 29th. Football practice does not cease even for Christmas day and a mama who just wants to see her behemoth boy open his stocking with a cinnamon roll in hand. Soon Faith will leave for college too and my nest will be down by two. If I focus too much on my aching heart my jolly turns into jaded.
I also battle my internal financial scrooge. She is a miserly piece of work-motivated by fear and never having enough, despite God’s provision. And Christmas brings out the worst in her. All the spending at Christmas makes my heart thump with nervousness and anxiety. I remember those days as a single mom when my funds were precariously low and I was just trying to give my kids a few presents, dreading the terror of the great reckoning day in January when the bill came due. Even though we have enough, the fear still chases me at times.
But every morning as I sit alone in the quiet, I am reminded that my longings lead me back to the true reason for Christmas in the first place.
We all want our homes and social lives and even Christmas cards to be unique and beautiful. We dream of a drama free season of kind people, love and ugly Christmas sweaters galore, but when we miss the mark, and life goes askew it’s so easy to lose that special feeling.
What if all this busyness and spending and yearning for the perfect Christmas is simply a metaphor for our deepest desire? –to be known and loved and rescued.
The scene in the Grinch where the Who’s sing in spite of the loss of their decorations and gifts inspires me. Even if nothing gets wrapped, even if I buy all the wrong gifts, Christmas, in all it’s glory will still come. And the Spirit will be there for me if I only cry out for him.
The Christmas story, this tiny baby in a manger, is our symbol of freedom and redemption and the only gift that will give us what our hearts long for, rescuing us from things that can’t satisfy.
Does this mean Target and Hallmark are bad? Heck no! My Red Card with the 5% discount get’s lots of use. But it does mean that Target and my favorite movie, “A Crown at Christmas” won’t heal or fulfill my heart. Shopping till you drop might break your wallet, but it won’t change Christmas one bit.
The Christmas gift that Jesus offers-the freedom to not get caught up in the busyness and glitz and glam is free. This red card was bought with blood.
When I look at Christmas through this lens, it changes the way I celebrate. I slow way down. I want to savor each moment. There’s memories and smiles, tears and heart ache in my blue Christmas bins. No need to rush! Pulling out the ornaments is like examining the pieces of our life and displaying them on a tree for all to see. Decorating becomes an offering of joy, thankfulness and remembrance of those I’ve loved and lost.
Celebrating Christmas with Jesus as the center is a game changer. The lights outside on our home are offered as a gift to the community not as a “check me out, I’m awesome” statement. The cookies I bake are a precious gift of time laughing with my girls. Caroling and parties and time with friends are a treat for my soul, not another “to do”. And paying for it all?–a journey of faith, discernment, and trust. Believing that God knows what we need (and don’t need) and trusting him to provide takes the burden off my weary shoulders.
So this year, I refuse to let Christmas enslave me to the bondage of creation.
We don’t need to be stressed about the finances, the anxiety of image management, the pressure to give the right gift or act in a certain way. We don’t have to dread the family drama and get hives at the thought of weird Uncle Bob.
Christmas is a celebration of the great rescue- not a month-long imprisonment of debt and uncertainty.
To quote the wise old sage Charlie Brown, “It’s not what’s under the Christmas tree that matters; it’s who’s around it.”
Merry Christmas my friends! May the true Spirit of Christmas fill you with Joy!
–Samantha
