My last post “Talk about Sex” generated some tremendous dialogue and initiated more questions than I have answers for. Clearly I hit on a hot button by openly discussing why I talk about sex within the church community.
What I hear people saying loud and clear is “we need this conversation and we need more of it.”
I hear you.
And since I’m not one to shy away from a tough debate, giddy up, let’s talk about this, in-depth and with radical honesty.
Before we begin though, I want to lay some ground rules. There are many points I want to address on this “oh so sensitive topic” and I won’t be able to do it all within one post. I would be glad to oblige if I didn’t have three kids, two jobs, ministry and a husband.
I know. I know. I need some cheese and crackers with my whine, but please be patient with me.
I also want this to be a two-way conversation, not a diatribe. So play along. Feel free to engage and comment. I feel vaguely safe from all the haters out there who violently disagree with me, mainly because we are online and you can’t yell at me, but take it easy on the punctuation marks and the name-calling. I have a list of alternative bad words if you need to be creative.
Ok…now we have some ground rules. Here are some of the topics I want to cover. If you have suggestions too, I am wide open.
- Waiting is HARD to do. (Give me a REASON to be pure)
- How far is too far?
- Why does the church ignore singles?
- Why is sex important to God but not Sr. Pastor’s?
- The bumbling buffoon and the media (Counteracting the stereotype of the incompetent male)
- Wives –the ministry of intimacy.
- Talking about sex with our kids
Shall we begin? Let’s start with “Waiting is HARD to do”… And we’ll begin tomorrow.
Totally lame right? I lead you to begin a great conversation, and then I leave you hanging. It’s sort of like what we do with our kids. Every day they are bombarded with images of blatant sexuality. The world says it looks good, feels good and it’s so easy to get.
But then we –as good Christian church people tell our kids, “oh by the wait, just wait another twenty years for it.”
Your boner is bad. Sex is wrong. And for God’s sake, “do not touch yourself.”
And then my Jr. High kid turns on the radio and Katy Perry says, “Forget that nonsense. You won’t die if you take a bite of this yummy sexy hot red apple.”
Of course we might think twice if they showed us all the side effects of pre-marital sex… you know, like the disclaimers on the pharmaceutical ads? “This drug will help you with your depression… could cause dementia, diarrhea, increased sensitivity to noise and loss of desire to do anything fun…” sounds awesome! I’d rather be depressed. (See 10 Worst Prescription Drug Side Effects to laugh your butt off)
Actual Side effects of sex before marriage include: Unwanted pregnancy, emotional scarring, abortion, HIV, HPV…which leads to ovarian cancer, genital warts, STD’s and the slow but gradual ripping apart of your soul, so that one day when you do find “the one,” you won’t actually be capable of emotionally connecting with a human anymore and porn on the internet and masturbation will be your “go to gal” instead of a real live complicated woman.
Wow…that sounds appealing.
But what if I told you there was a good reason to wait? And it was a compelling reason that doesn’t suck?
Would you wait for dinner if you knew you were having a filet mignon and sushi or would you go ahead and feast on Cheetos every night? And never, ever be really satiated?
What about waiting for ten million dollars? Would you work for five or ten years to collect a fortune or would you settle for a thousand bucks today?
But we’ll get to that tomorrow. And maybe it will be worth the wait ♥
