I have an idea for a new iPhone app. I am confident it will redefine marriage and solve the disparity between Mars vs Venus communication quagmires. Basically, it all boils down to a script for men.
Any man, employing these simple top ten phrases will successfully navigate the difficult and treacherous road to a women’s heart. Finally, the man-fixer and the woman-emoter will live in peaceful harmony.
When a man feels like saying “that’s dumb,” the iPhone will translate with proper tone and enunciation, replacing his words with, “I never thought about it that way, how compelling.”
MAN THINKS iPhone AP REPLIES:
How can I fix this problem? That must be difficult dear
Oh no, she’s got that bitch face on Tough day? How can I help?
Your boobs look hot! Honey, you take my breath away.
I want sex! I am the luckiest man here to be going home with you.
Those jeans make your butt look fat. Those jeans make your butt look hot!
If I go through the motions, can we have sex? Let’s just hang out and talk?
This dinner sucks. This is interesting, how did you go about preparing it?
Celine Dion tickets? If I pretend to like them, will I get sex? I love this gift!
You spent how much money to look exactly the same?
I noticed you got your hair done, it looks lovely!
